We see it once in a while — couples get back together and make things work, even after a huge break-up.
However, far more frequently than not, people reunite only to discover that the story repeats itself — a rehash of why they split up in the first place.
Are you considering rekindling your ex-flames? lover’s Here are ten reasons why you should think twice.
1. A leopard’s spots never change.
The adage that a leopard’s spots never change has some truth to it. In many relationships, we find people who are unwilling or unable to change their “spots,” and thus their harmful patterns persist.
This is a recipe for heartbreak; you’ll almost certainly end up on the same path again.
2. You didn’t find a solution to your problems.
Is it vital to ask oneself if the issues that led to the break-up were addressed? Otherwise, there will be a repetition and/or a continuance of relational issues.
Save yourself the hassle, especially if you know your ex is unwilling to put in the effort necessary to settle the issue(s).
Taking your ex back could entail inheriting more troubles that will not be resolved, resulting in the relationship’s death once more. You don’t want to continue whirling in circles.
3. You had a toxic relationship.
If the relationship was unhealthy before the break-up, the toxicity is likely to worsen when you return.
He or she may also believe that you are prepared to deal with any amount of toxicity and you’re not willing to expend any effort to purge the union of these toxic traits and energy.
4. You played the role of the sidekick.
If you’re the “other woman” who left the relationship, re-entering it could bring you more emotional distress.
It also conveys the message that you have no idea what you’re worth, that you’re prepared to accept anything, that you don’t mind becoming just like the other women, and that you love him more than you love yourself.
Most likely, all he’ll do is continue to offer you “what’s left.” Save yourself, concentrate on yourself, and you will draw a partner who will provide you with the affection you seek.
5. Your ex is violent
It’s becoming increasingly difficult to get out of an abusive relationship unharmed these days.
These tragic stories frequently appear in the news. If you can free yourself from an abusive partner’s clutches, whether it’s physically, mentally, or both, you should thank your lucky stars and not look back.
Returning to an abusive spouse, particularly one who doesn’t perceive the problem with his conduct, refuses to seek treatment, and/or refuses to seek professional help, would be a “suicidal” option.
6. Your ex was really a liar.
If your partner’s behavior was previously characterized by dishonesty and infidelity, there’s a low chance he’ll have changed his ways by the time you return.
7. Your ex is self-centered or had a self-centered goal in mind.
Make sure you’re not being enticed back in to fulfill someone’s purpose, as this could lead to you being trapped.
Some people are only loyal to you because they need you. You’re likely to be abandoned as soon as he’s finished with you.
8. If he’s already done it, he’ll do it again.
Humans are creatures who stick to their routines. This tendency is best described by the phrase “once bitten, twice shy.” It’s a good reminder to keep away from individuals and situations that have damaged you in the past.
Taking back your ex exposes you to the same level of pain that you would have experienced previously.
9. The relationship felt like labor
As a result, you felt compelled to repeat the same actions, such as investing and reinvesting.
It was draining you physically and emotionally, but it never seemed to be enough to maintain the relationship afloat.
This can indicate that the relationship has reached its end and that you do not need to resurrect something that suits you best when it is dead.
10. You’d be settling down.
Going back to your ex, whether you started the break-up or just went through with it, cannot possibly feel like an ideal circumstance.
It means you recognize that there is something better out there for you, that there must be something missing in the relationship you would like to be fulfilled in.
You should never go back to your ex if you know him or her well except you’re too busy to date and get to meet someone new, or you’ve been through a lot together.
You can be depriving yourself of happiness by meeting someone you don’t want to split up with or who doesn’t want to break up with you.
As a result, if you do decide to reconnect with an ex at some time, make sure it’s on your conditions, as anything else will be business as usual.
Reference – https://www.jamaicaobserver.com/all-woman/10-reasons-you-should-never-go-back-to-your-ex_174124